Ecclesiastes

I was reading in Ecclesiastes a few days ago and there was something that touched my heart but I was running late for work so I did not write it down. Then I could not remember what it was. Tonight it jumped out at me again and so I am posting two times tonight, sorry but I don't want to forget again!
Chapter 3: To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven.
How many times have you read this or hear this or watched Foot Loose and heard him quote it? I have hundreds of times, it was one of my favorite things growing up, seeing how many things I could remember it talking about. I never had the passage hit me so hard as it did the other day and then again tonight. There is a time, here on earth, for everything and we must embrace the stage we are at in our lives and make the most of it. We are suppose to do something right now, right in this part of our lives. Find out what that is and just do it. President Monson said "This is your time. What will you do with it? Are you where you want to be with your life? If not, what are you going to do about it?" (Three Gates to Open 14 Jan 2001)
I need to be grateful for the season I am in and the place I am at. I need to be thankful for the time I have with the kids who are still around. I need to make the most of everyday and not get drug down with the worries but find the joy in things to keep me built up. I need to surround myself with happy people and when around negative people, take the opportunity to bring a bit of joy to their lives and not let their outlook bring me down.
I am where I ought to be so I need to say the things I ought to say, when I ought to say them. This has always been hard for me, I have spoken my mind throughout my life and sometimes I should have kept quiet and waited for the proper moment to say what I had to say. I probably would have done it more tactfully. Sometimes I have hurt peoples feeling with my opinions and I am truly sorry for that, please forgive me. I have passed up the opportunity to say things when I should have been more outspoken and for that I am truly sorry. I look back on my life and regret not telling more people about the gospel. I regret not telling people more often that I love them (I love you all!!) and I regret not talking to my Father in Heaven as often as I could have. But this is my time now and I need to take the time to do what I ought to do. My problem is that right now, I don't know what that is. So back to the scriptures I go . . .

Liken the Ensign

I love reading the Ensign, I try to read the articles and see how I can apply them to my life. I try to put myself in the story and liken it unto me. I love the article about the Lord enabling imperfect people to work beyond their natural abilities. I think I spend too much time focusing on all my faults and worrying that I can not do things. I have to tell myself that God can use me even with all my imperfections. Moroni 10:32 helps me to remember that I have to forget about myself and focus on doing the work I was sent here to do and I can only do that with the help of my Heavenly Father.

I loved the article reminding us to inquire of the Lord. We spend too much time asking others what we should do or telling our friends how we feel and we sometimes forget to talk to our Father. We need to remember to go to Him in our joys and in our sorrows. We need to tell Him our secrets and our fears. We need to pray without ceasing. We need to thank Him more often and let Him know how much we love him.

Prayer and Scripture reading is what is going to help us protect our families. We need to take the things we learn and use them in our lives. We need that to help us hold on to our beliefs. This is a trying time and we must remember who we are and where we came from but even more than that, we must do what we need to do so we, as a family, can return with honor to our Father in Heaven.

All Good Blessings Come From God

How can we show Heavenly Father our gratitude for all that He has done for us? That is my focus right now, concentrating on the good blessings in my life. I have to stop thinking about what I USE to have and what I WISH I had and focus on the here and now and all the blessings in my life. Heavenly Father is so good to me. I have a wonderful family and we have food to eat and a home to live in. We have cars to drive and work to drive them to. All of my children are able to go to school and they all attend church and church activities. We are free to practice our faith without fear. We have a good church family who cares about us and prays for us, whether they live here in Arkansas or back in Utah, the prayers go to the same place. We have cell phones so that we can keep in touch with each other any time we want or need to. We have a web camera so that we can watch Bailey grow up even tho she is hundreds of miles away. We have two dogs who alert us when people come around, even if it is at 11:00pm.
So how can I show Heavenly Father my gratitude for all that He has given me? I can joyfully go to Him in prayer and thank Him. I can read my scriptures to learn more about Him and how I should be living my life. I can attend Conference on the Internet and at the meeting house and rejoice in the things I hear there. I can attend my meetings on Sunday and I can read my lessons ahead of time to be able to take part in the lessons. I can focus on learning everything there is to know about the new Family Search so that I will be an asset to my ward. I can be available to help others when it is convenient for them even if it is not convenient for me. I can really, really try to do my visiting teaching and not find excuses about the gas money and the time it takes to drive that far. But most of all, I can focus on teaching my family how good God is to us and the struggles we are going through is just to make us a stronger vessel for Heavenly Father to use. I love you Father!

My New Calling

Oh My GOSH!!!! I am soooo excited! Joy and I were late getting to church even though we left 45 minutes before it started! We had to stop in and see Linda who is sick. Anyhow, Jennifer was saving us a seat and we walked in with about one minute until they should have started and Bishop motioned for me to go into the hall. He said he was sorry to do this with short notice but they had a calling for me. He told me and I was so excited, I have been called to be one of the family history counselors!!!! I am so excited, I spent all afternoon and evening yesterday on the site and I love it and I didn't even know I was getting the calling!
I am so blessed to be called into something that I love doing. They are going to start Sunday school classes and they even have a plan to get everyone to find an ancestor to take to the temple. They don't know that I have been through all that before - YES - I finally don't feel totally stupid when I have been called to something. I learned so much the first time I had this calling back in Utah and now I can put that experience to work here. I'm so excited, that I just can't hide it (are you singing along?). Anyhow, I know that we were sent here for a reason and this is one of them, the kids and I all can help. We LOVE getting to know peoples ancestors. I will keep you posted.

Please Comment

Please post comments about what you think when you read my blog. If you have insite to what I am feeling or learning, share it. If you are reminded of something in your own life because of what you read here, please share it. We all learn from each other. Share your wisdom with me and I can learn from your journey and make mine a more pleasant experience. I am sure you have Spiritual wisdom for me and also guidance as I try to raise my children and then let them go with the hope I trained them up in the right way. Maybe others can learn from your comments as well, we are here to help each other!

Understanding The Plan

When I read last weeks Relief Society lesson I had so many questions, I was hoping that they would be answered at church. I left with even more questions but reading ahead to the next lesson I have hope that they will be answered then. I now understand that Heavenly Father took some of the matter that was already out there and formed our Spirits. This was an answer to some of my questions. Reading Jennifer's history lesson for the week, when talking about learning from our mistakes, it quotes from Ecclesiastics 1:9 saying "...there is no new thing under the sun". It hit me so strong at that moment, I understand now, everything has already happened before and will happen again, if not in this world then in the worlds to come. The mistakes I have made have been made by others before me and will be made by other after me if they do not learn from my mistakes. How can they learn from my mistakes if I do not tell others what I have learned? How can I learn from others mistakes if they do not share them? We are all here to help each other. If we see someone going through things we have experienced, we need to share our experiences and then let their agency take them through it in their own way. EUREKA. I can tell my children what I have learned but I have to let them experience it themselves and make their own decisions and hope they remember my lessons and choose the right. We share our children's joys and sorrows as we watch them learn and grow. They bring so much love to our lives. With each child our love grows larger and deeper. The same goes for Heavenly Father. Heavenly Father's joys and sorrows come from watching us. We must do a better job doing the things that bring him joy and try our best not to bring Him sorrow. Have you read Ecclesiastes lately? You should reread it keeping in mind that Heavenly Father is speaking to us and explaining that our search for happiness lies in Him.

I can hardly wait for two more weeks until we get back to the Plan and I can learn more about what happens after this life. I hope you all read up on this so that that my many questions might be answered!

Train Up A Child In The Way He Should Go...

Kids grow up so fast. It is hard to believe that Jeremy is married and now a daddy and Jack is off at college, Jennifer is a Senior and Joy is a Sophomore.
I have always loved the scripture Proverbs 22:6 that states: Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.
I think about that scripture often as I see my children do things that I worry about. I probably did the same things as a child but I would hope that I have brought a different way of thinking to their lives than I had as a child. I loved my church experiences as a child and all the friends I made searching for the right church. I would not trade them, they made me who I am today but I hope and pray that I have been able to bring something more to my children's life, something more to hang on to, to share with others. I watch them and realize that they know so much more than I have been able to teach them and I credit their primary teachers and YM/YW teachers who were more than teachers to them but also friends. They had wonderful Bishops along the way, men they could turn to for guidance and role models. I am very grateful to all those who have shaped my children into the wonderful people they have become. There is a song called "And then they do" about your children growing up and you can't wait for a stage of their life to get over with and then they do move on and I think back now on all the times I spent with my children and I am very blessed to have been there to help guide them. I love spending time with my family and I am grateful to know that someday we will be sealed together and be able to spend forever together.

Lessons I have Learned - Be Careful What You Ask For

I remember kneeling in prayer one day asking Heavenly Father to make me the strong person He needs in order to get my work done in this estate. BIG MISTAKE. I have learned that you will often get what you ask for but not always in the way you want. I have grown stronger through the many trials we have been given. I know that the medical problems and the financial problems we have endured have made our entire family stronger. We still struggle with the trial of separation, with Robert's work taking him away most of the time and Jeremy and Lora and Bailey living so far away. It is painful not be able to see them when we want and to talk to them about everyday stuff. Sure we talk on the phone but the calls do not contain the simple everyday joys of life, what they are feeling about things and seeing their eyes light up as they talk about an experience. I can't wait until we are sealed together, knowing that we will be able to spend all eternity together. I can see the growth in myself and also in my family as we continue to try to become the people Heavenly Father needs to continue his work here on this earth. I can't see the big picture as Heavenly Father does but every now and then I catch a glimpse of why we endured such hard times as we are able to help others through things we have already endured and easing their burden somehow makes it worth it.

Lessons I have Learned - Family Home Evening

At different times during our 12 years in the church we have had Family Home Evening. I have been told by different people what Family Home Evening is all about. I have been told that it must have a song, prayer, lesson and treat be considered FHE. I have been told that it can be as simple as spending time together. I have been told that it should be educational and always carry a message.
I have tried different things with my children and I know the concept is to grow closer together as a family and build the eternal relationships. It is hard with teenagers. I did well when they were younger but as they got older and started working and having school activities in the evenings and just everyone going different ways, I have fell away from the Monday night ritual. I now try to spend quality time with my kids whenever they are home. Sometimes we talk about church issues, sometimes we play games, and sometimes we watch movies together. I use to feel like a failure because I did not have Monday night lessons but now I am o.k. with it. I know that I spend time with my kids to the best of our abilities. I wish life were perfect and we could have the perfect FHE with songs and lessons and all that but I am grateful to be able to spend time together, even if it is not on Monday evening!

Lessons I have Learned - Scriptures and Prayers

In the past few years I have learned many things that will help me on my journey back to Heavenly Father. I will attempt to share some of them with you.
It is very important to read your scriptures and say your prayers every day. Yes I know that the leaders of our church have been saying this over and over but I have actually learned for myself how true that is. When you get away from your daily scripture reading you lose a closeness to Heavenly Father. He speaks to us through the scriptures, not only in the actual words but by that still small voice you hear as you read. He will guide your reading if you let him. You need to be open to go where He leads you and learn the lesson being shown to you. Prayers are another way of speaking to Heavenly Father. This is the way to talk to Him and then wait for an answer. We too often rush through our prayers and then jump up and get on with our day and don't wait for Heavenly Father to speak back to us, leaving him there wanting to talk to us. It is like when our ask us a question and then rush off before we have time to answer because the phone rang or something came on the TV or they thought of something else to do. Taking that time to just kneel or sit quietly and wait is more important that rushing on to the next thing.

Chapter 16 Lesson

I have read all the way through Sunday's lesson on Revelation and the Living Prophet. I did learn some things. I did not know the story about the stone before. I love the way the chapter is written and the topic was reinforced to my spirit. I think I need to take the time each week to actually study the lesson and not just read through it. I was excited at the things The Spirit brought to my mind while I was reading and pondering on the things being said. Far too often I have gone to church not even knowing the topic we were going to learn about and I have missed so much of the lesson that they did not have time for and I did not take the time to go back and reread it. I will try to do better from now on.
I was amazed at the line about the things being revealed to babes in the last days - I feel that my children know more than I do about the gospel, they have had a chance to go to Seminary and to YM/YW and to learn at such a young age and they have embarrassed the gospel and they live it. I have far too many faults and I pray that I am not holding them back from the blessings they deserve because of my lack of wisdom. I have stopped praying for more wisdom because when I do pray for that I find myself in another trial that I have to get through and I am tired. I need a break from the trials and I need a bit of a rest so I can gather my strength and be the warrior that I need to be in the last days.

Cassette to CD

A thought just occurred to me. I was given a cassette tape of the Sacrament meeting that day that has my talk and Elder Ballard's talk on it. Does anyone have a way to make a CD out of the cassette so that we can listen to it and then share it if we need to?

The Man Who Wrote The Book

After we were baptised we moved to Utah and spent two weeks living at the home of the parents of Brother Garlich who had came over many times with the missionaries in Colorado. Brother Garlich's Dad was the Bishop of his ward. He asked me to speak in church. I was so scared. He had asked me the night before we found a house to move to - timing! I thought I would get out of speaking but he asked me to do it anyhow. He said he wanted me to speak on my conversion and to take about 20 minutes. I started preparing my talk and was surprised one day when he came over to my house and asked me to say my talk to him and his wife. I was not finished with it but I told him what I had planned on saying. He said that it would be fine. Then that Sunday night when we were visiting at their house and many of their grown kids were there with their families, he asked me to give my talk to them so that I would not be so nervous the next Sunday. So I did, it really did help me get prepared. Then Sunday came. They had Sacrament last and I was getting nervous sitting through the two hours waiting for my turn. When I walked into the room one of the counselors came up to me and said We are truly blessed today and gave me a hug. Then I went up to where my family was suppose to be and asked if anyone had seen them yet but they had not arrived. Sister Garlich introduced me to the woman sitting next to her as a Sister Ballard and I politely nodded at her and then spotted Robert bringing the kids and went to help them get settled before I went up front. Then Bishop Garlich said he wanted to introduce me to someone. He said "This is Elder Ballard" and I said "Oh my gosh, you are the man who wrote that book!" He laughed and said "Sister Deaton, Heavenly Father is truly blessing us today" He told me the story about how he was suppose to be out of the country this weekend and how plans had changed at the last minute and he was able to come and hear me speak. I gave him a hug and said "Thank you for writing the book, it has saved my life" He smiled and we talked for a minute and then I went and sat down because it was time to start. As the meeting went on I sat and marveled at the way things were turning out and was very grateful that Bishop Garlich had me practice my talk two times in front of other people!! Keep in mind that I looked at Elder Ballard as a man who wrote a book NOT realizing how important his position was in the church. I started out nervous but quickly relaxed and gave my talk. Then Elder Ballard got up and spoke. It was a shock to hear him say that he had been following up behind the scenes to make sure the missionaries did their work. He offered to seal our family in the temple when that time came. He said to continue my missionary work and service. After the meeting was over he came over to me again and we hugged once again before he was mobbed by the member of the church just wanting to shake his hand. We were separated by the volume of people trying to press their way onto the stand and that was the last time I spoke to him. Although he does answer my letters and continues to give me advise and encouragement. I pray that someday he will be able to seal our family in the temple just as he offered. I later had a chance to speak to one of the missionaries who had been teaching us and he explained to me that no matter what time they got home each night they had to call the Mission President to give him a report on how things were going because Elder Ballard was calling the Mission President to see how things were going. He said that they were told I was as "golden as they get" and that I had a great purpose here on this earth. WOW, how could I ever live up to that?

Released

Sunday I was released from my calling as the Enrichment Counselor in Relief Society. I was relieved and I was sad. I loved being able to work with the women but at the same time I was frustrated in the attendance at events and the need to keep doing things the way they had always been done. I pray for the new Presidency and I hope that there will be more opportunities to socialize with each other and break the barrier of the clicks. The activities committee has something planned for next month and I am looking forward to that. It is a night of heirloom cooking and the New Family Search program. That should be FUN. You know me, my passion is genealogy! I look forward to the excitement of the night and am praying that many people will come. It is so important to work on our genealogy and to take our ancestors to the temple. We must get our work finished here, I truly believe that we are living in the last days.

Why Flamingo?

People has asked me why I use the nickname Flamingo. It is a sweet memory for me. One day my son brought me home from school a Flamingo on a key chain. He explained it was from they box they could choose from when they had enough class points. He told me that the Flamingo reminded him of me. I could not see the resemblance at all so I asked him about it. He said the Flamingo's did not care what people thought of them, they just lived their lives the way they wanted to, just like you do mom, you do not care what people think about you joining the church or living the gospel, you just do it. Three more times that year he brought home more Flamingo's for me and I have proudly hung them from my visors in my vans ever since. One has since gotten broken but the other three hang there as a daily reminder that I am not to be afraid what people think, I am to live my life the way I want and I am to help others see that the gospel really can make a difference in peoples lives. I have a few other Flamingo in my house and someday I will have them in my yard again like I did in Utah, the smaller ones that the wings turn in the wind reminding me that I might get blown around in this world but my base it strong and secure as long as I keep it Anchored to Christ.

My Conversion - Part 4

The Elders had set up the interview for Jeremy, Robert and I on a Thursday evening. An Elder came down from the Denver Mission Home to conduct the interviews. He took Jeremy in the other room first, then Robert and I was last. I had been very nervous about this becasue they told me I had to know all the names and dates from the church history and they would be asking me many questions. I could not remember all the details and was very worried that I would not pass the interview. Then it was my turn to go in. I sat across from the Elder and he said to me "So why do you want to get baptised?" I said oh that's easy and began telling him my story and why it was important to get baptised. He just sat back in his chair, smiling while I spoke. When I finished talking he said "I will never get tried of hearing that story." "I just met you tonight, when have you heard my story before?" Then he said, "Oh, you're a big hit back at the mission home." Then he went on to tell me how he and his companion had been the ones to take Elder Ballard's call and that the Mission President had been in contact with Elder Ballard to keep him up on the progress I was making. He said that all the missionaries in the district knew about me and my story. Then he said that I would be able to be baptised and he did not even ask me any more questions, what a relief!
The day of the baptism came and I was so worried that something would go wrong that I went and picked up the missionaries from their zone meeting and we kept them at our house most of the day to make sure we were going to get baptised. The baptism went smoothly and we were confirmed that night as well.

My Conversion - Part 3

I looked at them and motioned with my hand to come on. I smiled at them and said, "well come on in" They just kept looking at each other but then they came in. One of the boys introduced himself and his friend and said "How did you know we were coming?" "Oh some guy wrote to me and said he was sending you" "Do you mind if I see that letter?" So I reached over to the make shift table by the door and handed him the letter and started to talking to the other boy. The one with the letter said "It's from Elder Ballard" I said, "yea, some guy who wrote a book, have you ever heard of him?" With a smile on their faces he said, "He is a member of our church" I was impressed, these kids knew all the members of their church! They explained they were split up from their friends and if I wanted one of them would come back and answer my questions the next night when his friend was back. (OK, so later I found out what a Split was and that this friend was his companion and the district leader who read the letter was not normally there) They left a movie for me to watch about families being together forever and a book for me to look through (blue Book of Mormon). I was so excited and could not wait for the next day to come. Robert was leaving the next day to go to Provo Utah and see if this was a place we might want to move to. He wanted no part of listening to some boys talk about church. He took off about an hour before they were due to arrive. He returned home just before they got there saying the pass had been closed due to the snow and he could not go. So when the boys arrived and found out that Robert was home, they asked if I would go get him so they could meet him. The whole family was in the room for a few minutes and then the kids went to play and I started asking questions. They were hesitant to answer my questions, they kept saying "That is in lesson three or we'll get to that in lesson 5" I was very frustrated. I wanted the answers to my questions not a history lesson and other things. Robert was very skeptical and when they left they asked if they could being someone with them when they returned the next day. They brought Sgt. Garlich who was able to put things into army terms so that Robert could understand more of what they were saying. The three of them came back the next night also. It was Friday night and I we had been at it since 6:30 pm and it was after 10. They had to leave. I had so many more questions. The next afternoon when they came by and sat down, Robert started arguing with them again about how what they were saying could not be correct. I finally just yelled, " Will you just get on with this, I want to be baptised and I can't do that if we can't get past lesson two." I looked at the missionary who had fallen out of his chair and said "What's wrong?" He said, "Nothing, it is just a missionary thing" " I AM allowed to get baptised aren't I?" Yes, but we need to finish the lessons first. We found out that Jeremy had to sit in on the lessons also since he was 10 but not the other kids. The missionaries were at our house everyday eating lunch and dinner most days and taking turns helping me find the answers to my questions in the scriptures and keeping the kids busy so I could learn. Then came the day to get interviewed for baptism.

My Conversion - Part 2

One day after one of Robert's many doctor appointments, he came home and said they were going to change his MOS because he could not be on his knees that way anymore. The doctor put in the paperwork and when it came back, instead of a change of MOS he was being medically discharged. This had never crossed our minds. He had 11 1/2 years in the Army and was making it his career. We had to begin deciding where to go and what kind of job to get. Robert was able to get on the computer at work and tried to find a place that was family friendly and the crime was down, the schools were good and jobs were available. Utah keep coming up on the searches he did. We decided we needed to find out more about Utah because the only thing we knew was it was were those WEIRD Mormons lived. We began looking in to it and I decided to go to a bookstore and find a book about the Mormons actually believed instead of just the comments everyone was making about them. I went to a bookstore I had been in before that had great clip art books. I went in and looked around trying to find a book but nothing seemed right. I had a sick feeling in my stomach as I searched and searched but could find nothing. There were two ladies who were working in the store and during my 20 minutes of searching there were very few people in the store. I kept glancing at the two women talking hoping that one of them would ask me if I needed any help. Nothing. I left the store and went to my car. While sitting in my car I felt the Spirit talking to me. I said, If it is this hard to get a book then I don't want it. He said to me, What means more to the runner? Walking around the bases and going home or getting a hit and stealing second and then third and then sliding into home plate just under the tag?"" Well of course it means more to the runner when he has to work for it" "Oh I get it, I have to work for this" I went back into the store and started walking around again. Finally I got up my nerve and went right up the ladies behind the counter and said "I need a book that tells what the Mormons actually believe." One of the ladies said, "Are you LDS?" I said, "I don't do drugs" She said, " L D S not LSD" I said "I don't even know what that is so no I am not one" She took me to the very back of the store, and handed me book from the very top shelf. I thanked her and paid for the book and went home. I put the book aside and did not even look at it again until Sunday. Robert and the kids were gone and I settled in a chair and began. Our Search for Happiness by M. Russell Ballard. Well, I am definitely searching and I do want happiness. I began to read. I do not even remember the rest of the family coming home that day. I kept reading until I had finished the book. I had so many questions. At the end of the book the author put his address and said if you have any questions to write to him. Well, I thought, if he was going to be dumb enough to but his address in the book then I was going to be dumb enough to write to him. And I did. I do not remember how long the letter was but it took two stamps to mail it. I mailed it on Monday Jan 22 1996. On Friday of that same week, I received a letter back. I was so excited, I opened the letter and began reading. He started off in the first paragraph saying he was going to send a couple of young men or women to visit me and answer my questions. "Do you believe this guy, passing me off already" was all I could think about. He did go on to answer some of my questions and I felt a peace that I had not known before. I was excited now. Every time I heard a car outside I ran to the window to see who it was. We lived on the Army Post in Colorado Springs at the time and there were always car doors outside and I was always at the window looking out. I was getting tired of this by Sunday afternoon and got out the phone book. I was going to call this church he mentioned and see if I could find these missionary people he spoke about. It was no use, no missionaries were listed in the phone book. I would have to wait. I continued going to the window at every noise but still nothing. Then on Tuesday afternoon I heard a car pull up to the apartments and looked out the window. There were these two boys in dark suits and white shirts and big hugh name tags on. I knew in my heart this was them. I waited at the door peeking through the peephole trying to see what was taking them so long. After going through their bags for what seemed like hours they headed for the sidewalk that led to my door. I threw open the door and said "I've been waiting for you!" They froze in their tracks and just stared at me.

My Conversion - Part 1

When I was growing up I went to church every Sunday with my mother and brothers and sisters. We were Presbyterian. I loved going to church and I even sang in the choir. We were heavily involved in the Youth Group and went to church camp and spoke during Youth Sunday. I loved it. But during Sunday school I was known as the "trouble maker" because I kept asking questions that no one could answer. I was always wanting them to explain the scriptures and just how could a Father take part of himself and send it to earth to live. There had to be a better explanation than that. There had to be more to Heaven than just "better than you can imagine". I could feel the Spirit speaking to me when I prayed but He was not always there. I felt His presence in my life and was proud of the scriptures I could memorize and spout off at a moment's notice but something was missing. When I was a Junior in High School I began searching for what was missing in my life. I went to church with some of my baptist and Methodist friends but it did not satisfy my thirst. When I went to college I continue searching. I went around asking people what church they went to. I asked them to take me to church with them. Most of the time the kids would say "well, we don't actually GO to church but I can tell you where they are." I visited every church I could find but nothing seemed to satisfy me. I even went to Buddhist church once although I have to admit I did not stay long for the service, I felt really out of place there. The only churches I did not visit were 1. Jewish 2. Jehovah Witness and 3. Mormon. I could not find anyone who went to one of these churches. I was not happier at any other church so I stayed where I was. I began to attend church off and on over the years not being happy at any of them but felt it was important to go. I tithed to all the different churches I went to. I prayed and read the Bible, many different versions of the Bible. I always felt something missing and longed for the peace of what the next life would bring even though I did not know what it would be like. My husband was in the Army and we moved a lot. I would always search out people who went to church at each new city and hope to find what I was missing.

Another Blessing

Heavenly Father is very mindful of us. We were shown that again yesterday. We had to replace the van because of a wreck and I prayed that we would be shown the correct one and it would be in our budget. We went to the first car dealership and Robert and Jack and Jennifer got out and started looking at the different types of vans and talking to the salesman. I was on the phone with Robert's great aunt who was sick. Her Grandson works there. When I walked over to where they all were I asked if Robert had asked for him and the salesman went and got Brent. Jennifer told me she wanted the black one. They showed me in a different van how the middle seats swivel and the we looked at the black van where they did not. Brent arrived and we started talking about this van and it had everything we wanted in a van and more. We went inside and he did everything he could to get it close to the same payments we were currently paying. We were able to get the van at a good interest rate and then able to drive away with it. We did not even have to look at other vans. As soon as I started looking at the van I KNEW it was the one we were suppose to get. We were led there by Heavenly Father. There is no doubt in my mind that He knew what we needed and even gave us a few extra things. It was truly a miracle.