If everyone knew what I knew

Sometimes I get sad because I know that not everyone knows what I know. God sent His Son into the world to die for me. That is the greatest gift, the eternal life I now have because He did that for me. How do I get people to understand that? I talk to people about it but they just don't get it. I know that no one can convert anyone, that it is the Holy Spirit that helps them see the truth and that they must make the decision on their own. We can not force them to see the truth, that is what Satan wanted but that is not how it is suppose to be so I have to do my part by praying and talking and teaching and then maybe they will see. I believe the unbelievable. I know that God lives and that He love me and someday He will say to me "Well Done Thy Good and Faithful Servant". I look forward to that day but until then, I must teach and serve!

Temple Experiences

I am so happy for Joy, she is out in Utah visiting Jeremy, Lora and Bailey and she gets to spend the weekends with her friends. Janet and McKenna took her to the Draper Temple Open house the day after she arrived in Utah. Then last Sunday she was able to attend the Dedication ceremony with the Coopers! When she was being interviewed by their Bishop for a recommend to go, he asked her to speak in church on Sunday before they all went to the ceremony. She spoke on temples. She had not attended their ward before and I was very surprised that she accepted the opportunity to speak but from what I am told, she did well. It just goes to show you that the church is the same everywhere and she felt at home with our very dear friends who were also speaking that day. I have never been to a dedication ceremony before so I made her tell me all about it. What a blessed event! She now has a deeper love for temples.

72 hour kits

Throughout the past 13 years I have worked on my family 72 hour kit. I found every list I could and made sure that I had everything on it so my family would be prepared. The past few weeks I have gone through my kit and reorganized it for our current situation. I realized that I am home most of the time by myself or with just one child being here and there was no way I could carry all the kits if I had to evacuate. I now have them all down to just two buckets. You have to pick and choose what is best for you and your family, just like in your food storage, pack what you need, what may work for someone else may not work for you. What worked for you 5 years ago does not work for you now. This is one of the reasons we are asked to update our kits each year. Conference weekend is the perfect time to see what you have and what you need to get. Make it a family project, something to do in between sessions. Commit to it and then just do it!

Put Yourself in their shoes . .

During my 13 years in the church I have known people who, for one reason or another, could not take the sacrament for a period of time. I have often wondered why this is done. If you are struggling with something how could NOT taking the sacrament help you? I decided all on my own to NOT take the sacrament, repent of any sins I committed during the week and see what happens. DON'T DO THIS. I had a terrible week. It was harder to stay happy and upbeat. It was harder to see the positive in people, instead I dwelt on the negative. It was harder to make the time to read my scriptures and say my prayers. Let's face it, the Sacrament is a very important part of our lives. I am having an even harder time now trying to figure out why they tell people NOT to take the sacrament when this time in their lives should be the time they need it the most. I am grateful I have not done anything to cause me to not be able to take the sacrament and I will not try to put myself into others shoes in this way again. Maybe someone can explain how this is suppose to help those who are struggling already???

13 Years ago

It was 13 years ago that I began reading the Book of Mormon for the first time. I read it all the way through while the Missionaries were teaching us for those 24 days. I did not study it, I just read it to make sure there was nothing in there that I did not agree with. I wanted to make sure there was no contradicting messages and that there were no cult teachings. There were not any. It was a peaceful feeling when I read, very familiar messages. I believe with all my heart that the Book of Mormon is true and that it is just another testament of Jesus Christ. I love the way that Christ taught everyone and not just a select few. I love the fact that everyone was important to Him and He left no one out. If the Savior stood beside me is such a wonderful song. I had looked up the history of the song and had it prepared to share with the Young Women's class I was subbing for last week and then when I got there I found out that they were beginning to learn it for an activity this next week. I was grateful to know that I was in tune enough to listen to The Spirit and prepare the way I did. The song is all about stopping and thinking if I would do the things I do if the Savior was standing right beside me, watching over me. I hope the girls take to heart the things the song says and treat people with the respect they should.

Trust In The Lord

Trust in the Lord always . . . I have been reading the scriptures and there is a story about a man who was told to build a boat. He did not know how to build a boat but he trusted in The Lord and he did as he was told. He prayed about it and was able to ask the right questions and get answers and then he and his family built a boat.
What can we learn from this story?
1. Sometimes we are asked to do something we do not know how to do. When that time comes, we need to trust in The Lord and turn to him for answers as to how to do the thing we are asked. We might be asked to learn how to live when you have lost your job. We might be asked to suffer through a sickness or disease that will teach us how to humble ourselves and pray for help. We might be asked to learn to live without a loved one, through death or simply moving away, and experience a small glimpse of what Heavenly Father went through when He sent His Son to this earth to pay a price He did not owe.
2. We need to pray. When faced with a difficult task we need to pray for guidance. We need to pray a prayer of thanksgiving when we are blessed. We need to pray always, not just when life gives you more than you can handle but if we pray always in all things, we will be ready to handle everything life gives us.
3. We can not do things alone. We need to turn to Heavenly Father to comfort and guide us and we need to use the people he has sent to us to help us. Most times it is our own family members that are there for us, to help us, to strengthen us, to lean on, to help build that ship in our own lives. Turn to your family for they will be with you through out all eternity. But there are other people sent to help us as well and when people are sent to help you, you need to swallow your pride and let them help. You also must be aware of those around you and when you see they need help then you need to help them even if they do not ask. I will never forget when I was in college and Linda had me go with her to deliver two sacks of paper products to a lady that was in need. We left them on her front porch about 10 minutes before she was to return home from work and waited down the street so we could watch the house to make sure she got them but where she could not see us. Later that night Linda got a phone call from this lady talking about the angels that left her exactly what she needed because she had no toilet paper left and she had no napkins or paper plates or paper towels in her house and it was such a blessing.
Sometimes we do not know why we are sent to do things but God knows and we need to be ready when called upon. It might be we are building a ship to save someone even if it is disguised as a sack of toilet paper!

We are those saviors

Elder Theodore M Burton has said: "The promise was made them, our ancestors, that even if they were born at a time and place where they could not hear the gospel preached in life, God would provide saviors for them from among their descendants so they could eventually receive all the blessings promised them. We are those saviors." In our church, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, we believe that we will all be together again in the next estate (when we leave this earth). How wonderful it will be to get to the other side and see the people who belong to the names in our family tree. How wonderful it will be to look them in the eye and know something about them because of the work I am doing during my lifetime, researching their past, learning all I can about who they were and what they did and what it was like when they were alive, what the ship looked like that carried them to the United States, how if they did not have the courage to leave Poland or Scotland and settle here, I would be living a very different life right now. I am grateful to my ancestors for the courage they had in living their lives the way they did, even when their families disapproved and cut them off wanting nothing more to do with them, because now I have the freedom to live my life the way I choose and open up paths for future generations. I am grateful I have the opportunity to leave a legacy of faith for my descendants to follow.

Following the Example of Jesus Christ

Today I am blessed to be able to teach Jennifer's Sunday School class. The lesson is on following the example of Jesus Christ. He is the perfect example of how we should strive to live our lives. It is a nice reminder to try to be more like Him. The Savior said "What manner of men ought ye to be?" then answered "Verily I say unto you, even as I am" and that got me thinking, are there things in my life that I could change? I decided to start making a list of things I needed to change and then I realized that the list of things to keep the same would be much much shorter! I have taken the challenge that I am going to give the girls today, Live for 24 hours as if Christ were right beside you seeing everything that you do. In the lesson a girl begins with the way she set the table, instead of a wrinkled tablecloth with stains on it she put out a clean one and even picked flowers from her yard to put in the middle of the table, even tho it was just her family eating dinner, she stated "I don't know of anyone I'd rather fix things up for than our own folks". Why do we only bring out the good china when company comes and even then it is not all company that gets to use it? Why do we treat others better than our own family? We do not have to use it everyday but why not every Sunday or any other day of the week we choose? I will let you know how my 24 walk with Christ goes.

Stake Challenge

Our Stake has challenged us to read the Book of Mormon before the next Stake Conference in June - Conference to Conference. Jack and I have taken that challenge and we are reading after the girls leave for Seminary and before we leave for work. So far, so good. We are on schedule (ok, we just got the challenge three days ago but we are off to a good start!)This time I am taking a different approach when I am reading because I am looking at this as my family history. Sure they are distant cousins but at some point our lines meet. I am reading a history lesson on my heritage so I am reading with that thought in mind and want to know what story Cousin Mormon is going to tell me next. Try it out, it is a really cool way to look at everything.
You can do the same thing with the Old and New Testaments. Read the Bible as if it were an older relative telling you stories about your family.

Finding Joy in the Journey

Conference Oct 2008, President Monson gave a talk entitled "Finding Joy in the Journey" and we are going to be discussing it in Relief Society today for our lesson so I decided to reread it this morning so that I would have everything clear in my mind and could take part in the discussion. I loved this talk when he gave it, and I loved it again when the Ensign came out and I love it again now. I have printed off a copy of it and will keep it with my scriptures so that I can refer to it often. When I read it I think about how often I dream of tomorrows that never come. I worry about when will I have time to do things with the kids like I use to and not be tired every evening when I get home from work. I think about the yesterdays when the kids and I would spend all our time together, going to support each other and being involved in each others lives. I often regret living here, being so far away from friends and family and knowing that Jennifer will be moving out to Utah in the summer to live with Jeremy and Jack will be on his mission and it will be just Joy and myself home. Time flies by so quickly. Some things in life seemed so large at the time and took alot of effort but they were just fleeting moments and now they are gone and other things have taken their place. I do try to enjoy the here and now and I cherish the moments we are all together. I am very thankful to Heavenly Father for all that He does for my family. In the last week and a half we were able to travel to Missouri and see most of my family, then back to Arkansas to spend time with Robert's family and all the kids were together, laughing and having fun and fighting at times, just like they use to. Robert has been home for two weeks now, enjoying all the time together with everyone. It is a sobering thing to read the words of President Monson when he says "Brothers and sisters, my sincere prayer is that we may adapt to the changes in our lives, that we may realize what is most important, that we may express our gratitude always and thus find joy in the journey..." I have taken inventory of the things I have and the things I can not change and the things I have to look forward to on the other side. I am very grateful for the true gospel in my life. I am very grateful that Elder Ballard sent missionaries to our home to help us find the truth that this church teaches us. I am grateful to know that someday my family will be together forever with true love for each other and time to spend together. I am very grateful that Jack is home for this semester before he leaves on his mission, so we can spend time together, working and playing and having a priesthood holder in the home again. Jack is such a good example to the girls and myself, he is going to be an awesome missionary and who knows, maybe he will be a good example to Robert and our family will be able to be sealed together in this lifetime! I am going to try harder to find the joy in the journey and life each day to the fullest. I will enjoy the last few games the girls have in basketball knowing it is Jennifer's last because of graduating this year and because we do not know where Joy will go to school next year and if she will be on any sports teams. I am going to enjoy having Jack and Jennifer both work in the same office as me even if we do not see each other much during the day. I am going to enjoy using the webcam and seeing Bailey grow up and be thankful we have this technology to use. I am thankful that both of the kids work at places that will allow them to be off on Sundays and also Wednesday nights so they can attend church activities. I am thankful that we have jobs and cars and a home to live in. I am thankful we have clothes to wear and friends to visit with, even if only in emails and blogs. I am grateful to have the gospel in my life and to know that my Savior lives and that He loves me enough to die for me. I am grateful to know that one day I will return to my Heavenly Father and that just maybe, He will say to me "well done thy good and faithful servant" or it might just be "well thanks for trying" but either way, I WILL return to him. I love you all.

Jack's Special Day

Sunday Dec 21, 2008 Jeremy was able to bestow the priesthood on Jack. It was quite a day. We arrived home just after 2:30 AM and unpacked the van and then off to bed. Bailey slept in until 7 AM so I was able to get a bit of sleep. It has been a long time since 8 people needed showers/baths before church and the timing had to be worked out but we all made it. Jack and Jennifer left early to meet A.J. and Jacob at the church. They drove in from Russelville so they could celebrate with Jack. Robert went to church with us and we took up one and a half pews. They had asked me to say the opening prayer and Jeremy to do the closing prayer in Sacrament. I was so proud of Jack when they asked him to stand and we all were able to raise our hand and sustain him in his new responsibilities. It was a nice service and I was able to hold Bailey part of the time. Then afterwards we met in the Bishop's office and talked for a few minutes and then Jack sat down in a chair and those who already have the Priesthood gathered around him and placed one hand on his head and the other on the shoulder of the man next to him. Then Jeremy said a prayer and blessed Jack with the ability to use his priesthood to help those in need. He prayed that Jack would be able to seek out those who would need him in the future and to be strong in his faith. He blessed him to be a bright shining light to those he meets and to bring joy to many people. He blessed him to be in the right place at the right time and to continue to learn the scriptures so he can help others. It was an amazing blessing and then Jack got up and hugged all the men in the room and also ME. He was going to hug all the girls when he got into the hall but I do not know if he did or not. After that we all went to our house and Jack was able to spend some time with his friends before they drove back to Russelville and then on to somewhere south of Fayetteville. I am so very grateful that both of my sons live worthy to have the priesthood and that they take their responsibility seriously. Jack will now be able to help give people blessings. He will start attending the Elders meetings and prepare his papers to submit for his mission. He is hoping to have everything ready for mid march when he is able to submit them. We are all very proud of him and I am very grateful the whole family was there to witness it.

Blessings For Christmas

Heavenly Father knows what we need and blesses us when we do what we are suppose to do. We have ice today and our office is closed. I was all dressed and ready to leave when I got the call but I thank my Heavenly Father because I really did need today to get ready for our trip and get the house ready for company. We leave tomorrow at noon and arrive home Sunday morning sometime. We will go to church and then Sunday evening the Linda Deaton family will have Christmas at our house. Then on Monday we have an open house for people to come over and see Jeremy and Lora and Bailey. We also are getting our family pictures taken on Monday so it will be a busy time with lots of company here. The girls are trying to get their schoolwork finished up and Jack has to sort out his room and find a place for all his college stuff, it will be a busy day! Why am I posting all this in my church journal instead of my regular one? I believe that Heavenly Father is blessing us today. We have the ice today instead of our traveling day tomorrow. We have the ice today so I can stay home and work. We have the ice today so I can spend some time with Robert and the kids and we can enjoy being a family. We are truly blessed! I can spend more time in the scriptures today getting ready for this wonderful season instead of being rushed to get everything done. We are so blessed. I love you all and Merry Christmas to you all, keep Christ as your center and all will go well.

December Thoughts

December is my favorite time of year, I can talk freely about our Savior and people listen! I am able to talk about His birth and it does not offend anyone. I can play Christmas songs on the TV in the waiting room and no one complains that I am playing religious music. The Spirit of Christmas is what I love. People are in the mood to help others out. They freely give of their time and talents and money to help those less fortunate. They smile more and open doors for strangers and don't complain as much when standing in line to check out and they expect traffic and plan for it. If only more people carried the Spirit of Christmas all year long, what a wonderful thing that would be! As my kids are getting older they look forward to Christmas in different ways than when they were young. I remember the excitement of decorating the tree and talking about each ornament they hung and sitting in the dark room at night just watching the lights. This year I did the tree all alone, no laughter, no stories. I watch the lights by myself at night and remember all the fun of Christmas past and look forward to the day when my grandchildren will help me put up the tree and make new memories. Our children grow up too fast and are out on their own before you know it. Make the most of the time you have with them. I think about Dana who has one married and many more all the way down to just starting elementary school. She can see all the stages at once and is enjoying being there for all the kids. I think missing Mike coming around makes her enjoy Carson all the more. We can learn from our kids and that will make us better grandparents. I am glad for this time of year, I love to smile.

Lesson 44 Suggestion for Family Discussion

Today during Sunday School I noticed the Family Discussion Suggestion so I decided to give it a try. We are to read Mormon 8:34-35 and then write a letter to future family members "as if those family members were present".
I feel your presence in my heart and I have great love for you. I have prayed for you and the strength you will need to fight the good fight and to stand strong in your convictions. I want you to live so that those who do not know Christ will want to know Him because of the way you live your life. Ponder the atonement of Christ and hold the lessons deep in your heart. Learn the words from the scriptures and recite them over and over in your minds to give you strength. Keep your minds and heart clean and you will be a great help in the battle here in this estate. Remember. Remember the words of those who went before you and the sacrifices they made for you. Do all that you can to not sin, but when you do - Repent and be made spotless once again. There is a season for all things to come and you must be ready for that time and not be caught unprepared. Christ lives. The Book of Mormon is real. Read it, ponder it, learn from it, let it guide your steps. Say your prayers in your closet, say your prayers with your families and say your prayers with your peers. Don't be ashamed to pray in public, over your food or over the sick or in front of other church members. Don't let pride take over and consume yourself with costly clothes or houses or cars or things in general. Don't get into debt. Store enough food to feed your family and those who you will take in during the difficult times. I know that your heart will not allow you to let others suffer while you have food and shelter you can share. Be prepared. Remember that Christ is your anchor and you can do all things through Him!
I write this for my children and my grandchildren and all those who come after me but I also write this for anyone who reads it and believes in Christ. I love you all. Amen

Letter to my kids

To my wonderful children,
During church today it was said that if we knew we were about to die what would we want our children to know? I decided I would write to you so that you would know how much I love you. The greatest desire of my heart is for us to be together for eternity. I want you to be able to stand strong in your faith and to return to Heavenly Father with honor. I want you to know that I believe with all my heart that this is the true church. I know that Heavenly Father lives and loves each one of us. I know that Jesus Christ suffered and died for us but even more than that, I know that he lives. I know that he volunteered to come here and die for us so that we would have the right to choose for ourselves. I know that he was born in a lowly manger and rose to great heights on that cross, and he did it all for us, for you and for me. I know that he lives and that he is there for you. I know that if you go to Heavenly Father in prayer he will answer your prayers, not always in the way you want, but in the way you need. We go through trials here so that we can become stronger. We learn to go to Heavenly Father during those trials and to seek His wisdom to make it through them. We learn to become closer to Him and to be more like Him by our choices we make and the paths we follow. I pray that you will learn to hear His voice and follow it all the days of your life. I pray that you will have the courage to stand up for what you believe in and share the gospel with others. I pray that I will have the wisdom to teach you the things you need to know so that you can become mighty warriors in our battle here in this estate. I pray we can all be sealed together someday soon. I pray for each one of your spouses that they will be a great help in your journey back to Heavenly Father and that they will treat you as the sons and daughters of God that you are. I pray for your children and the wisdom you will need to raise them in these troubled times. I pray they will fight the good fight and in the end remain standing strong. I love you more than words can describe. I love you so much that it hurts when I have to watch you make mistakes and I wish I could go through your pain for you but I also love you enough to let you make your mistakes and grow from them. I don't want you to ever doubt how much I love you or how much I love my Savior and my Heavenly Father. I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, my Lord and Savior. Amen

Lessons I have Learned - Prayer for Others

Last Sunday in church one of the speakers talked about praying everyday for 20 minutes straight and how it changed his life. I decided to take that challenge and get up at 5:00 am so I could fit it in along with my own prayers and the family prayers. I not only pray for 20 minutes but record in my prayer journal who and what I prayed for and then I want to be able to go to that journal when I am down and read about the things and hopefully I will be able to see how God works in our lives. I started off the first day and went about 45 minutes trying to get everything in. I was very thankful and then prayed for everyone I could. I have continued each day since then and I find it very rewarding to take time to pray for others and I am excited to be able to go back later and record how their lives have changed. I find my love growing for each person I pray for, even those I do not know their names. I may never hear how number 25 on the flames basketball team gets healed but I feel a comfort when I pray for her so I know she will be fine. I have spent much more than 20 minutes a day each time and I feel better all day long. My own prayers are getting shorter, lesson learned - less time on myself and more on others!!

Take the Time

I find that I lose all track of time when I am researching information on my ancestors. I love to read about the places they lived and try to pictures what their lives might have been like. I have started taking notes on what the town was like close to the time my Mother's family lived in the different places in Scotland and have added those notes to my PAF file. It is fun to read about what the houses were like and how the town grew. I will do this for all the rest of the sides also but I am still on my Mom's side right now.
I love the scriptures that talk about turning the hearts of the fathers to the children and vice versa. I really do feel like I love them more and more each time I find out more information about them. We need to learn as much as we can while we are here on this earth and I have decided that reading more about where my ancestors came from is a clue as to who they were and is an important thing to do. I have heard so many people say they do not have time for genealogy. I have decided to give up 30 minutes a day to make the time to find out something new. It might be 30 minutes of sleep I am giving up but most of the time it is 30 minutes of wasted time that I will not miss. I have to plan my time more effectively to get this done but if we all did that then we would be more ready for Christ to return. You have to take the time.

Heavenly Father speaks to us

This week I have been reminded that Heavenly Father speaks to us through others. Sometimes, no matter how much we pray and study our scriptures we still need to talk to others and get feedback and discuss things. I still have questions that I struggle with and most people just don't talk about things they don't know the answers to. I spent a good deal of time this past week talking about my questions and my fears and being thankful. I have learned much because of a very special boy and am grateful to have been blessed by his family. It is true that our lives are examples to others and someone is always watching and learning from our actions.
I also love the missionaries. All of them. They take the time and talk to you without looking down on you or judging you. I have been in the church for 12 years and still talk to the missionaries because they are so in tune with the Spirit and they compliment each other by jumping in and taking over when impressed to do so. Feeding the missionaries is a selfish act I think. We always have them give us a lesson after dinner before we take them back. It is wonderful to be reminded of the things that are truly important and to watch what they give up to be out here. I love you all, remember the important things in this life is what we will be taking with us and it is easier to learn lessons and grow here.

Slack in my studies

This week I have been slack in my studies and my prayers have been lacking the time I should be giving. I have repented and I WILL do better this next week. I have learned a few things. I truly feel better mentally when I give the correct time to my prayers and scripture reading. I am in a better mood. I treat people better. I am more cheerful. So why would I not take the proper time everyday and do what I have been asked by my Father in Heaven to do? Why do kids disobey? I think that sometimes we are lazy and sometimes we think we don't need to do it. I have watched my kids as they struggle with growing up and wanting to be the adult but not quite there yet. They want the best of both worlds, the playing and the grown up attitude all at once. I then look at myself and see the same thing. I want to make my own decisions and slack off on things I know I should be doing by playing around but I know that it is wrong. I need to be a better example to my children. People watch us and judge us by our actions and I need to be more like my Savior and always see the good in people and be there when I am needed. I can only be there when needed if I have done my scripture reading and studying and can talk about the things I am learning and be that example to others. It is a choice and I choose to live my life with all glory going to my Heavenly Father.

Things Happen for a reason

Things happen for a reason and we do not always know what that reason is. Sometimes I wonder why so much happens to us, things we can do without. I watch to see God’s hand in our lives and try to focus on that instead of the negative. When the deer jumped onto the hood of the car I was very grateful that the girls had already slammed on their breaks, seeing the deer ahead of time. I have no doubt that the deer would have smashed through the windshield and hurt both girls in the process but because there was divine intervention they were both uninjured and the car only has an indention the size of a baseball. It could have been much worse.
I wonder why we are struggling with the ability to get school work done and keeping a computer working. With the girls homeschooling and doing their work on the computer they must be connected to the Internet and with Jennifer’s computer still in the shop it is a struggle to get both girls on one computer. I am sure there is a lesson in here somewhere but right now I am not seeing it. I know these struggles sound small compared to others but we each have things that test us in this life and we are judged as to how we handle them and what we can learn from them in order to help others. I loved our lesson in Relief Society this past week when we were talking about the Light of Christ. It was such a special day and I went home and studied more about how we are special because we choose to be. We choose to go to church and we choose to do our callings to the best of our ability. We choose to believe what we do. We choose to be happy and get up out of bed each day with the promise that if we will do our part then Heavenly Father will do His. …Choose you this day whom you will serve; … but for me and my house we will serve the Lord… Joshua 24:15